Wednesday, March 16, 2011

The Elephant in the Room.

Today we're going to talk about...

DEADLINES.

The reason we're going to talk about deadlines is that there is one looming over my head like an elephant being held up by dental floss and, as such, my brain is not really capable of picking apart nuances of the writing process. So, sorry if this blog comes out a little rambly and stream-of-consciousness-ish. I promise I'll return to coherency next week after I have completed this draft.

(OMGGUYSSERIOUSLYTHERE'SANELEPHANT).


Like the men in that car, I'm feeling a little concerned.

Deadlines are important though, despite the anxiety factor, especially for people like me. And by 'people like me', I mean people who turn procrastination into an art form. As much as I love to write, I always seem to be able to find eight hundred other things that I need to (or, often, simply can) do before I can settle in and really work. Often I require bribery, extortion, threats and, yes, looming elephants in order to get things done.

Why, you ask, if you love writing so much? I think it's a combination of things. Mostly it's because I have the attention span of a four week old cocker spaniel. It's also because the closer I get to finishing my novel, the closer I am to having to let it go. Soon I'm going to have to put it in the hands of someone who isn't Laura--who has been picking the plot apart since before the plot existed--and trust them with my baby. Trust them to love it, or hate it, or be completely indifferent to it. And that scares me.

However, I didn't write this manuscript so that I could hole up in a cave with it, stroke it and call it 'my preeeeecioussss'. I wrote it because I had something to say that I thought was important. Because I had characters in my head that wouldn't shut up. And because, at the end of the bribe-filled, elephant ducking day? Nothing makes me feel happier or more fulfilled than staring at my big pile of scribbled-on manuscript and knowing it is mine. I wrote it because I wanted the little girls I have been a nanny, babysitter, camp counselor, girl scout leader and big sister to, and the people who also read the books I love, to have, as John Green would say, a gift.

I wrote it because I wanted to share it with the world.

But the likelihood of the world ever being remotely interested in my gift is going to get even slimmer unless I meet this deadline. So, I guess I'd better get back to work

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Second Drafts & Finding My Way Out of the Forest.

Oh editing, how do I loathe thee, let me count the ways.

I won't really count the ways. I find it easier to be witty when not writing in list form. That doesn't mean I hate editing any less, however. I do. I really, really do.

While I was struggling madly this summer to finish my first draft of Unpolished Gem, people often gave me incredibly heartening encouragements such as, "You're almost over the hump!" and, "It's all easy after this!" and, "The hard part is almost done!" What I've come to realize, gentle readers, is that those people were either a) liars or b) some combination of sadists/masochists, (or, perhaps the most likely option, c) my friends and family who were hoping I'd stop crying and get off the floor). Because, while the idea that once a novel is written then all you have to do is fix it and that's easy is incredibly comforting while in the death throes caused by the end of a first draft? In my case, at least, it just didn't turn out to be true.

Sure, I hit lots of bumps while writing my first draft. Yes, I changed my mind six times as I wrote about the nature of my magical (not magical? full of magical people? just really freaking LARGE? uh, magical again?) forest and my draft reflects that, BUT I was pushing the story forward, I was getting to know my characters better, and (JOY OF JOYS) I was discovering how it would end! When it was done I felt accomplished, I felt invincible, I was the Queen of the World.

I had no idea what I was in for.

The problem with all those little inconsistencies and plot bumps I left behind to "go back and fix later"? Is that now... I have to go back and fix them. And while I know that editing is probably the most important part of the writing process, for me it lacks the thrill that comes with first telling a story. I know what happens now in this tale; I have three more stories in that back of my mind that want to be written - can't I move on to those?

No. I can't. Because I believe in my project, I believe in my story, and I believe in myself. Which means, no matter how frustrated I get, no matter how much I want to throw the computer and manuscript out the window every. single. time. that I find yet another reference to what I've come to affectionately think of as The Forest of Inconsistency, I have to soldier on. I have to turn on 'I Have Confidence' from the Sound of Music and sing it over and over and over again, loudly, until I remember that it's the things that scare me, that are hard, that are unfamiliar and frustrating, that are often the most rewarding, (and the most likely to get me married to a sexy Austrian naval captain).

Lest you think I'm giving second drafts a bad rap, mine has been helpful. Things make more sense. New storylines have emerged. My characters seem more three-dimensional. All of the good things that should happen with a second draft are happening. It's just that sometimes I get so bogged down in the semantics and the comma splices and That Damned Forest that I forget to focus on the good stuff.

Maybe that's what the second draft is really about in the end: finding your way out of The Forest of Inconsistency so you can see more clearly on the other side.

Okay, so, maybe I don't hate editing quite as much as I thought. Don't tell.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

I Have Returned!

Well, I sort of fail at updating this, don't I?

However, I've had a lot of requests that I start doing so again, so I will! I'm not going to try the twice a week schedule for right now, life it too crazy. I will pledge to update at least once a week, however.

To highlight how things have changed since I last updated the blog, (in JUNE, really? Sorry, guys), I have completed the first draft of my novel and am now almost done with the second draft. The book now has a title--thanks to my Awesome Aunt!--Unpolished Gem, and I've gotten a lot of really positive feedback. My primary Plan Sponsor, Laura C. Stevenson, (check out her books, especially The Island and the Ring and All The King's Horses, they're wonderful), and I have been really going after it and working out some of those first draft kinks. And, trust me, there were a lot of first draft kinks.

I've heard a lot of people say how much they prefer editing to writing the first draft lately. I'd like to state for the record that I am most certainly not one of those people. And I'll tell you why. In next week's post.

;)